Manchester, UK

ON SECOND THOUGHT – Sometimes Losing Is Winning

How often do you think about your loses? The knee bruising hits you took and the shiny things you once had living in the palm of your hands. I think I do that a lot you see, it’s really easy to do. All it takes is a little ponder and off you go; drifting into the depths of your own misery without even noticing. It’s a lot easier than counting your blessings sometimes being that somehow it feels like it requires minimal effort as if your mind does all the work unaided.

We all know that feeling of great loss all too well. It’s another common thread that ties us all together and reminds us that under our well-crafted personas, we are indeed all the same. We’ve all felt our pounding hearts knock on the doors of our chest until agony is released in the form of uncontrollable tears. We’ve all had opportunities slip away like fine wine leaving us flabbergasted by the course of life’s events.

Would you trade what you wanted with what you currently have? Maybe you wouldn’t. Maybe you would.

Losing is something we never manage to get entirely comfortable with no matter how much we try to. It still stings and hurts to lose, especially the things we hold dear to our hearts or the things that link us up with our fondest memories or the people we once loved with mind, body and soul.

Like a punch in the stomach, that’s how it can feel like to fail at something you thought was your forte, and while you might train yourself to take the punches better, it doesn’t mean the blow hurts any less.
Nevertheless, it’s the one thing that’s bound to happen to us all. Like with most things we have no control over, it’s all about the perspective with which we approach and handle them. It is true that saying; ‘it is not about what happens to you, but how you choose to react’ and even with the things we’ve lost, it’s all about the parts we choose to focus on.  

Today, think of all the things you lost that took you to a better, healthier place. Instead of dwelling on the fact that a friend walked away, think about how anxiety-free you’ve been since you’ve been judgement free. Think about how the train you missed allowed you to meet that very special person or the job you lost that put you where you want to be right now.

Would you trade what you wanted with what you currently have?

Maybe you wouldn’t. Maybe you would. Sometimes losing is exactly what it is, and sometimes your only option will be to take the L like a champ. You might be unable to find upsides to your loss, and there are some things that once lost are gone forever. Plus, who said you are obligated to find a silver lining in everything. Certain situations suck, some life events are painful to go through and that’s just part of life.

But sometimes, losing is winning, in other ways at least. There are some things you have now that you wouldn’t trade, not even with the ones you wanted the most in the past. As we grow and come into our own more and more we discover that our priorities shift with the passing of time, which means the weight of our losses carry a much different value as well.
As you go into the new week remember this whenever you lose; as painful as it may be at the time, you might have just won something of higher significance in the process.

Have a lovely week ahead. xx

Your restless romantic roamer

Click here to read more posts from the ON SECOND THOUGHT Sunday series

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